Even if I found another Colt Navy, I was still on shaky ground.The day after I got home, I enlisted the two girls to help me go through the peddler’s wagon very carefully looking for what we might find to improve my chances in a firefight. By this time, there had been a lot of searches made of the wagon’s contents, and what was left was pretty well scattered around and not in any logical order. I asked the girls to look for revolvers or for parts of revolvers and to see what they could spot related to ammunition.Like it or not, as long as I was going to circulate in the persona of a White man, there was no way that I could get away with carrying a bow or a lance. I could get away with the war club because a lot of other White men carried them as backup weapons. The knife was carried by everybody, so I could avoid concern about it.At last, Honey Bee let out a shout of joy. She had found four more of the Colt Navy pistols in their usual kit packages of bullet mold, etc. I had Honey Bee. One night I came in and saw that there was another guy training. Training in my gym at my time! At first, I was only aware of another person invading my space. I was concerned that he may be on one of my stations when I needed it… I only saw the downside of his presence. Soon I noticed that he belonged in a gym. He was tight. Six-foot-two, broad and cut… For the first time ever, I saw I had competition in the gym. This was my domain and now I was watching another version of me, maybe even a better version of me invading my space. I was angry. Angry that I no longer had a private gym and angry that he was a better version of me. As time went by I watched him more and more. First with envy. Then hate. During my squat sets, he was doing his bench press. I saw the amount of weight he stacked on the bar and quietly wished for him to fail. No such thing happened. During my bench sets, he was doing his deadlifts, stacking on 40kg more than I had previously done. I watched with envy, once.
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